Task Search
Checklists
How creative can you get with your first free checklist?
How to Romance Kaidan Alenko
This page of IGN's Mass Effect: Legendary Edition guide is all about how to romance Kaidan Alenko across the Mass Effect trilogy, including how to successfully initiate and complete it for the Paramour Trophy, and rekindle it in the later games.
Started in... | Gender Preference | Romance Type | Romance Scene? |
Mass Effect 1 & 3 | Female (Any in ME3) | Serious | Yes |
It goes without saying that there are BIG SPOILERS for all three Mass Effect games on this page.
If you don't romance Kaidan in Mass Effect 1, he can eventually be available in Mass Effect 3. By that point, Kaidan is available for both Female and Male Shepards.
advertisement
Mass Effect 1
If you're playing as a Female Commander Shepard, Kaidan will be the one to interfere with the Prothean Beacon on Eden Prime during the Find the Beacon Mission. You can begin flirting with him in places after that, such as immediately after the Med-Bay scene, or the Scenic View on the Citadel.
You aren't able to progress the Romance for real however until you complete your first Mission World (either Therum, Noveria or Feros). At this point, you have an extended conversation with him regarding how the other races view the galaxy, and his experience as one of the first human biotics. At the end is where you start progressing the Romance; interestingly, all three options will do this, even "To some degree".
After the second Mission World, Kaidan will talk some more about his time at "Brain Camp" and the mistakes he endured there at the hands of a Turian teacher named Vernus. Towards the end, Kaidan makes allusions that Shepard is special to him. Pick "Special?" and then "You're not" to continue the Romance with him.
After the third Mission World, Kaidan will conclude the story about Rahna and Vernus. While this doesn't affect the Romance in any way, Kaidan's tone at the end will be different if you're in a Romance with him. If you talk to Kaidan again, you'll have a more direct conversation about your blossoming relationship.
Towards the end of Virmire is where things get complicated. At a certain point you'll be asked to rescue either Ashley or Kaidan: one of them will be at an AA Tower, while the other will be at the makeshift bomb. If you want to continue the Romance with Kaidan, you'll need to pick "Rescue Kaidan" so that he can live.
After you complete all four Mission Worlds and return to the Citadel, the Normandy will be grounded, and Kaidan will appear to comfort Shepard while stuck on the ship. This is when your Romance with Kaidan will be Locked In, and it will happen unless you consistently pick Renegade options and be abrasive to him.
Once you have a Locked In Romance, then when you go to Ilos and start the one-way ticket to the end of the game, Kaidan will approach Shepard in their quarters. This is when you'll get the Romance Scene, unless you turn Kaidan away with Renegade choices.
If you want Kaidan to be with you at the end of the game, you should actually pick him when landing on Ilos. This is because you won't get another shot to pick your Squad after that point.
Complications with Liara
Liara is one the game's major complications when it comes to Romance. Because her young soul is all to eager to learn more about Shepard, she'll make some unintended advances towards Shepard even if you're trying to Romance Kaidan.
One Mission World after recruiting Liara, Kaidan will stumble into asking if you're interested in her or not. If you intend on romancing Kaidan, you should pick "It's not like that" to clarify that you're not interested in her. After that the conversation will resume as normal.
advertisement
If you've been making romantic advances with both Kaidan and Liara, then two Mission Worlds after recruiting Liara both she and Kaidan will approach you in the Comm Room about it. You'll have three options here:
- If you pick "It's not like that" and then "Goodbye, Liara", you'll choose Kaidan over Liara, and a Romance with Liara will be locked out.
- If you pick "I'm sorry, Kaidan", you'll pick Liara, and a Romance with Kaidan will be ceased.
- If you pick "Can't I have you both?" at any time, BOTH of them will be upset with you and you'll be locked out of a Romance with Kaidan. You can however rekindle a Romance with Liara if you pick this.
Mass Effect 2
Due to Shepard working with Cerberus and Kaidan working for the Alliance, unfortunately the player will only have one face-to-face interaction with him in Mass Effect 2, which is the end of the Horizon Mission. Interestingly, what you say to him in this scene has no bearing on the relationship. Once you return to the Normandy, you'll have an email from Kaidan apologizing for what he said and wishing you luck.
What actually determines the fate of your relationship is your faithfulness to him. If you Romance either Jacob, Garrus or Thane in Mass Effect 2, then in a scene early into Mass Effect 3 Kaidan will confront you about it and you have to make your choice. If you remain loyal to him throughout Mass Effect 2, his photo will remain in Shepard's Cabin and she will look at it after you initiate the Suicide Mission.
Ultimately a Kaidan Romance won't advance at all in Mass Effect 2 by direct interactions with him, it's much more determined by if you Romance any other Squad Mates in the interim.
Mass Effect 3
Kaidan is unique among the Mass Effect 3 Romance options because he is one of only three who can both be Romanced for the first time in this game, or have a Romance from a previous game continued. As well, while he was only available to Female Shepards in the original game, in Mass Effect 3 he's open to Male Shepards as well.
Clearing Your Name
The first thing you need to do before even thinking of Romancing him is to clear your name. After all, you were dead for two years and then worked with Cerberus, so Kaidan has a lot of reasons to be suspicious of you.
First, during Priority: Mars, Kaidan will have two scenes where he asks about your alliance with Cerberus. You'll want to answer "It was a temporary alliance" and "You know me better than that" for the first scene, while for the second scene you'll want to pick "How can you say that?" and "I never left".
At the end of Priority: Mars, he'll be gravely injured, and spend the next while at Huerta Memorial Hospital on the Citadel. While you can get him TM88 - Peruvian Whiskey from Sirta Supplies in the hospital, it's ultimately your conversations when he wakes up that matter.
advertisement
After completing another Mission, he'll drop you an email to let you know you can visit him at Huerta. If you were Loyal to him and didn't Romance anybody in Mass Effect 2, you'll be able to reaffirm that you still love him, or be more reluctant. If you weren't Loyal and Romanced Jacob, Garrus or Thane, you'll still have the option to choose Kaidan over them.
After completing a second Mission, Kaidan will send you another message letting you know he's accepted the Spectre position, and is up and about. You'll want to visit him again for reasons that will become clear below.
Citadel Coup
Things come to a head in Priority: The Citadel II, where Udina helps Cerberus launch a coup against the Citadel Council and is escorted out by Kaidan. Here you'll need to pass a Trust check, where various actions in the past will determine if Kaidan trusts you enough to side with you over Udina, which ultimately decides if he lives or dies. Here's all of the points you can earn or deduct:
- Romancing Kaidan in the first place during Mass Effect 1 gets you +2 Points.
- Sparing the Council at the end of Mass Effect 1 gets you +1 Point. Sacrificing the Council gets you -1 Point.
- If Kirrahe died in Mass Effect 1 and Thane died in Mass Effect 2, you get -2 Points.
- The reason for this is because nobody is there to stop Kai Leng from killing the Salarian Councillor during the coup, allowing Udina to fabricate footage of Shepard killing them.
- Cheating on Kaidan with Jacob, Thane or Garrus in Mass Effect 2 gets -1 Point.
- Picking the Paragon options on Mars gets +1 Point, while the Renegade options get -1 Point.
- Visiting Kaidan at Heurta while he's awake but bedridden at Huerta will get +2 Points.
- Not apologizing for cheating on him here will get -1 Point.
- Visiting Kaidan at Heurta when he's up and about and accepted the Spectre position will get +1 Point.
- Finally, right at the start of the confrontation scene outside the elevator, using the Paragon Interrupt to lower your weapons will get +1 Point.
So with all that, you can have anywhere between +8 and -6 Points to your name. During the confrontation at the end of the Mission, your points will determine if Kaidan trusts you.
- If you have 4 Points or more, Kaidan will automatically trust you.
- If you have between 0-3 points, you'll need to pass a Reputation Check.
- If you have enough Reputation, you can pick a Charm or Intimidate option that will earn his trust.
- If you don't have enough Reputation, you can only pick the white option on the right side of the Dialogue Wheel. Kaidan will refuse to trust you, and you'll be forced to kill him.
- If you have -1 Points or fewer, Kaidan automatically refuses to trust you, and you'll be forced to kill him.
So, after all that, assuming you passed and Kaidan lived, you can meet him again at Normandy Dock: Bay D24 when you open the door to the Normandy. Here you'll learn that Kaidan's been offered to join Admiral Hackett's Crucible team, but he'd rather stay with you.
- If you pick "Welcome aboard", Kaidan joins the Normandy as a Squad Mate and can be taken groundside just like in Mass Effect 1.
- If you pick "I don't think so", he'll be assigned to Hackett's team. You'll be unable to make any further interactions with him for almost the entire rest of the game, including the Citadel DLC.
Locking In Kaidan
From this point, you'll have several interactions with Kaidan to help lock him in as your Romance Partner. This is the point where those who didn't Romance him in Mass Effect 1 will be able to for the first time in 3.
To do that, you'll want to meet Kaidan at the Citadel at the Presidium Commons. This is also where you can Lock him In as it were. You'll want to pick the upper-right options on the Dialogue Wheel to seal the deal on Romancing him. If that's not your intent, pick the lower-right options.
advertisement
After Locking In
With Kaidan confirmed as your Romantic partner, the game won't let you start or continue for a Romance towards anybody else. In the Leviathan DLC, you'll have some unique dialogue with him in the final mission, and in the Citadel DLC you'll have a great amount of unique dialogue and altered scenes with him.
In the finale of the game, when you start Priority: Earth, Kaidan will visit Shepard in the Captain's Cabin for the big Romance Scene. In the calm before the storm before you go to the Conduit beam, you can have a final talk with him before you go.
The last time you can interact with Kaidan is in the Extended Cut during the final charge to the Conduit beam. Here, a Mako will overturn and flip dangerously close to him. If your EMS is 1,749 or lower, Harbinger will then vaporize him with his laser beam. If it's 1,750 or higher, he'll be injured by the Mako and Shepard calls for an emergency pick-up, where you can have your final words with him.
After you make your Crucible choice at the very end of the game, Kaidan will be the one to put Shepard's name up on the Memorial Wall. However if you picked Destroy and your EMS is 3,100 or more, he'll smile and refrain from putting it up, sensing that Shepard is alive.